Oh Really?: Latter Day Saints

*Disclaimer: Do not read the following blog if you are religiously sensitive. Do so at your own discretion. I don't mean to insult anyone and write what I honestly feel and if you can't handle it then OH WELL!*

I normally like to keep my blog airy, light-hearted and cheery and prefer to refrain from using it as an emotional dumpster, but I'm going to make an exception this one time because I am irked beyond belief. I have this really weird and freaky thing that I do sometimes where I like to make eye contact and smile at any person that I may be walking past. Sometimes I'll even throw in an animated hello with a British accent. After today however, I may have to retire this practice and simply stare straight ahead with a look of contempt. Why? Because today, I made the mistake of making eye contact with this:

*photo courtesy of uncorrelated.com*

I wish I brought my camera with me so that I could show you guys the real deal! But in any case, those that know me know that I'm far from being a holy person. The Mormon guy stops and says something to me in Chinese, obviously hoping to impress me. But I wasn't. From there, I'm not sure what happend. He basically launches into this HUGE speech that had something to do with the Man above. I interrupt him to tell him that I'm not a religious person and that I don't really care about this kinda stuff but he keeps going. I hate how freakin' persistent these people are! I was literally throwing save me (and not in the Godly way) glances at the people passing by. All I got in return were sympathetic looks. I was the unlucky and unfortunate victim of a conversion attempt. Finally, I stopped squirming and became fixated on the dude's retainers as his mouth was yakking away. As I was wiping away some eye boogies that were forming, I contemplated picking my nose. Would that make him stop and ride away in disgust?

Mormon: So like, God is perfect and he has this plan for you.
Me: I don't think he does. I make my own plans.
Mormon: Well, not like that. He knows what to do so that you'll be happy.
Me: (questionable look goes here) ... I'm thinking me and God have very different definitons of the word 'happy'.

Ok so maybe it didn't go down exactly like that but trust me, it's pretty close. Here is how I feel about the whole God thing: When something great happens to me, I don't thank Him. If something terrible happens to me, I don't blame Him. When I really want something to happen, I don't pray to him.

I don't criticize or tell others what they should or should not believe in so of course I get pretty peeved when others feel it's ok to do that to ME. (*Shakes fist!*) In my opinion, religion is the root of all evil. Too many times has religion been the reason of conflict. War. Marriage. Life.

Before the Mormon and I parted, he gave me this card that features some questions and if you want them answered then go to the link it offers. I won't be including the link. It just amazes me how different we all are because some people will read those questions and wonder what the answers are. I read them and think WHO CARES. Seriously, the next time this happens, I'm going to completely rip him/her up. Take no prisoners.

Out of respect for the card, I didn't toss it into the trash can. I recycled it instead. See? Who said I wasn't capable of doing good things?!?